Coupar Angus v ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club 3rd XI on Sat 11 Aug 2012 at 1pm
ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club Lost

Match report
The weather was set fair as the Forfarshire CC 3rd XI met at Forthill for their latest away jaunt in the SPCU First Division. On this occasion, a short trip through the Angus countryside to the village of Coupar Angus was the appointed fixture. It was a fairly young and inexperienced team that gathered on the steps of the clubhouse before piling into the cars with their PSP’s and backpacks full of sandwiches made by their mum’s.

Skipper Sim announced that he was heading straight to the Glamis Castle Proms after the match and this explained his natty outfit of unpolished and untied black lace ups, ill fitting beige trousers and black Donnay golfing pullover complete with statutory kebab sauce stains. The players wondered whether he would be allowed entry into the Royal event wearing such a combination - before realising that it was highly likely that he would indeed get in - as the security men would automatically assume that he had his own burger van within the grounds. The players were entertained on the journey North by listening to the Olympic coverage on the radio and it was hoped this and the events of the previous two weeks in London would lead us to have our own “Super Saturday” in the Perthshire foothills. The youngsters on their first trip to Larghan Park found the Portacabin combo that joins together to form a Meccano style clubhouse of great interest. There were some complaints about the size of the changing facilities which failed to match the lavish space they are used to at Forthill, however when we moved their scooters and roller boots outside it was clear where the space issue was coming from.

Simmy enjoyed his own Miracle Saturday by winning the toss for the first time in ten years and decided to bowl first on the artificial wicket. With a team packed full of young bowlers we knew that this could potentially be a long day in the field against an experienced home line up and this proved to be the case. Craig and Christian bowled well enough at the start and things were under reasonable control run wise; and Christian picked up the first wicket when Nelson chased a wide one and hit it to Bryce at cover.

Adees then came on and when he bowled Croll things seemed in decent shape, however this brought Edington to the crease and from the first ball he took the attack to the bowlers and hit a very rapid 60 before falling - much to the relief of the birds in the adjacent trees. His innings had changed the complexion of the game and with young opener Neave still playing carefully and looking increasingly confident, he was joined by Thorne and the big Guyanan continued to take the attack to the visitors. With Forthill committed to giving all of their young bowlers some overs and ensuring that they gained invaluable experience, Thorne hit some expansive blows and whilst he enjoyed some luck when the ball seemed to invariably land between fielders, he also played some fine shots on the way to a quick fire 81.

At the other end Neave started to play some more expansive shots of his own into the leg side and after passing 50 he eased his way towards three figures for the first time in his career. With one over left he completed a fine century and congratulations go to him on a splendid 101 not out. The innings closed on a mammoth 301 for 4 and credit goes to Coupar Angus for batting so well. The young Forthill bowlers stuck to their task well and 12 year olds Andrew and Kailas receive special mention for doing well on their bowling debuts for the third team – as does Fraser for a nice spell of off spin.

Tea was served from the front right Portacabin and after some poor food experiences in recent weeks it was with some trepidation that we queued to view the fare on offer. We were in for a very pleasant surprise as we were met with trays full of some very appetising sandwiches, some nice filled rolls, assorted savoury options, numerous cakes and biscuits and a large selection of doughnuts. To top things off, we were offered slice of possibly the most delicious cake seen in the history of the SPCU which took the form of a very large and very moist sponge filled with tasty cream and topped off with fresh strawberries. Plates were suitably filled and a space found on the grass - where the players lounged and tucked into their tea...........before going back for seconds.

The tea adjudicator had lost his faith a little in the game of cricket over the last few weeks, however this cheered him up no end and the Coupar Angus club are to be commended for the magnificent spread. They were awarded a season’s best 9 out of 10 and are now in pole position to claim this year’s Golden Urn award. The only reason that 10 out of 10 was not given was the deduction of one point for the use of rather ineffective plastic cups - which the tea adjudicator squashed when he picked up his cup of tea and badly scalded his right hand. This should not detract from the overall experience though - and it was worth getting a third degree burn in exchange for a slice of that cake.

The senior players discussed the possibility of reaching the 302 runs required for victory; and it was thought that the chances of winning were in line with Rangers winning the SPL, Dundee United winning the Europa League and Rossie Priory 2nd XI winning the Golden Urn...............however we thought we should give it a go and Clark was given instructions to go for it and he opened up with Christian. With cake still weighing him down and nursing a hand injury; Clark padded up and took guard on the plastic to face up to Coupar Angus’ big West Indian quick Roland Thorne. It was our first sight of Roland who is clearly a nice guy and a good addition to the Coupar Angus squad and to the league generally.

A few swings into the leg side and 25 runs later, Clark’s luck ran out and he was pouched at cover and he headed straight back into the front right Portacabin to seek out another slice of Strawberry Sponge- before taking off his pads and heading to the burns unit at Ninewells for urgent treatment. Craig enjoyed less luck and played on to Croll and this brought Bryce to the crease to join Christian - and the father and son combo batted sensibly and well as they looked to add to the total in the knowledge that the game could now not be won. Bryce moved nicely to 54 and seemed in little trouble, however he pressed the self destruct button when calling Christian for an impossible second run and the young boy had no option but to send the old boy back. A run out by some distance ensued and a rather upset looking Father stomped off to the sidelines. The thought was that Christian would not be receiving any pocket money for some time to come. Christian continued to bat very well and secured a well deserved 50 before getting out and this was another innings of great promise. The other Forthill youngsters all got some batting experience and a target of 200 to secure maximum batting points was set as the aim. Thanks to some lusty blows from Morgan (19 not out) and good support from everyone else including Kailas (1 not out) the 200 run target was reached in the last over.

On the way from the field Kailas loudly asked Thorne to confirm that he was indeed from Guyana. When he answered in the affirmative Kailas seemed very pleased.

Coupar Angus took the opportunity to give most of their players a bowl and Scott Mackay (3 for 26) was the main beneficiary of this turn of events. Noticeably missing from the list of bowlers thrown the ball was Michael Ancell – the home teams’ big money close season signing from Dundee High School FP’s. When asked why he had not been given a bowl; Michael said that he would be posting a video on You Tube to explain the situation but did say, “It is not easy for me being a Coupar Angus player. Most people don’t know what it is like being Michael Ancell playing for Coupar Angus, but it is stressful and not easy.” At the time of writing the You Tube video has not been posted, but we understand that Michael has made himself available to bowl in all future Coupar Angus matches and has turned down a lucrative offer to be a tea boy in the IPL. Coupar Angus are however considering leaving Michael out of future squads as it is alleged that he has been texting Dicky Miller and telling him that Bob Edington is a hacker.

So a pleasant game of cricket was enjoyed on the rolling lawns of Larghan Park. Over 500 runs were scored, a pleasant tea was enjoyed, the game was conducted throughout in a sporting manner and in overall terms it was a solid reminder of what amateur sport should be all about. Credit goes to Coupar Angus for a fine performance and on this showing their experienced team should easily secure their First Division status for next season. Special mention goes in particular to young Neave for his maiden century and he looks a player of real promise.
For the Forthill side, it was another step on the long road that is a cricket education for the whole eleven.

The youngsters all batted and bowled and will have gained greatly from the experience of playing against some very good batting in particular. Even the older guys will have learned and maybe the next time they as an almost 200 year old combination won’t bowl first on sunny days, won’t try and slog every ball and won’t take crazy runs. Then again – it is harder to teach an old dog new tricks...!!! The skipper headed to the Proms for some burger action....and the rest of the boys were shoe horned into two cars and ferried back to Dundee. En route we heard the action unfold at London 2012 and were treated to Mo Farah winning the 5000m and taking double gold. Hopefully our young Forfarshire sportsmen will be inspired by the sight of Mo Farah winning the 5000m and Bryce Robertson hitting a flawless 50 on the same day and put in the hard work and practice needed to reach the standard of these two great role models. For Mo it has been a case of hard work, dedication, treating his body like a temple, training every day, being committed to the sport and being the very best he can be. For Bryce it has been much the same....... with maybe the odd pint being thrown in here and there......

Next week we have a scheduled visit to Forthill on Sunday from Norwood, however with our under 15 team in Scottish Cup Final action that day the fixture is being re-arranged for a future date. This will allow all cricket lovers to take the road to Glasgow to support the youngsters in their quest for cup glory – and we wish them well with their efforts. Hopefully the experience gained in senior cricket will help them as they take on their peers.

Hopefully any changes in arrangements to the Norwood game will be handled well by the Reoch Call Centre who once again created some local sporting confusion this week. The Chief of the Reoch Call Centre personally took a call from Glenrothes who were keen for some midweek action and he went ahead and arranged a 20/20 game for Forthill last Thursday as a result. Thanks to the wonders of Twitter and other modern technology- it was thankfully discovered that the Glenrothes in question were in fact Glenrothes Rugby Club and they were looking for a midweek game of rugby with DHSFP Rugby Club who it turns out also have their calls handled by the Reoch Call Centre. Without modern technology and the prompt intervention of the Potts Private Detective Agency; last Thursday would have seen Glenrothes Rugby Club turning up at Mayfield for a game of rugby and Forfarshire turning up at Forthill for a game of cricket – neither of which was ever going to take place....all courtesy of the Reoch Call Centre.

Rumours also abound that the Reoch Call Centre also handle calls for the Monifieth Dundee United Supporters Club. When the Dynamo Moscow Supporters Federation called to set up a pre match drink ahead of the recent Europa League game, they were sent to Bryce’s toilet and locked in there with him. After they recovered, the Moscow contingent voiced their disapproval and when contacted for comment, they said, all we did was phone the Supporters Club contact and we said we wanted to go to Tannadice and have a big drink and he said he would organise it all. Then he sends us to this guy’s house and we get taken into his bathroom, he locks the door and then there is the worst smell in history and we cannot escape. Then he says that this guy Reoch had told him this is what we wanted to do. We contacted the Chief of the Reoch Call Centre for comment and he said – “I think I maybe didn’t understand their call. Apparently they said that they wanted to go to Tannadice and have a big drink.....but I thought they said we want to see the pan of Bryce and smell a big stink”

This week sees a massive weekend for the club with the first team facing a do or die fixture at Heriots FP where Premier League survival is on the line; and the second team have a similarly important game at Stoneywood Dyce where victory is required to secure SPCU Premier Division status. All senior players are asked to attend practice where they can and rally round and contribute as much as they can ahead of Saturday’s fixtures.

Players and supporters T shirts are available ahead of the weekend at £10 each with a variety of slogans... All t shirts are finished in white writing on a navy background. Slogans include;
1 – We are staying up
2 - Ted is God
3 – Dave Loves Freda
4 – Reoch Is Innocent

As already mentioned, the under 15’s head West on Scottish Cup Final duty on Sunday and our very best wishes go to them.

Coupar Angus Batting
Player name RunsMB4s6sSR
22w 6b 9lb 
for 4 wickets
301 (45.0 overs)
M Nelson ct  B Robertson b C Robertson 18
A Neave Not Out  101
G Croll b  Ahmed 6
R Eddington b  Ahmed 60
R Thorne b  Kelly 81
S McKay Not Out  4
M Grogan  
A Douglas  
M Ancell  
F Wann  
J McIntyre  

ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club 3rd XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Craig McConnachie5.022000.004.00
Christian Robertson8.0041141.005.13
Adees Ahmed9.0044222.004.89
Morgan Sargeant6.004500.007.50
Connor Wilson4.002600.006.50
Fraser Ross6.003100.005.17
Kailas Narayanan4.003500.008.75
Andrew Kelly4.0044144.0011.00

ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club 3rd XI Batting
Player Name RMB4s6sSRCatchesStumpingsRun outs
1nb 13w 4b 3lb 
for 8 wickets

(0.0 overs)
Clark McConnachie ct  Nelson b Neave 25
Christian Robertson ct  Neave b McKay 53
Craig McConnachie b  Croll 0
Bryce Robertson Run out  54 1
Connor Wilson ct  Nelson b McIntyre 6
Adees Ahmed ct  Neave b McKay 8
Morgan Sargeant Not Out  19
Fraser Ross ct  Croll b Wann 4
Andrew Kelly b  McKay 0
Kailas Narayanan Not Out  1
David Sim  

Coupar Angus Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
R Thorn5.011800.003.60
A Neave6.0126126.004.33
G Croll4.0116116.004.00
M Grogan6.002500.004.17
M Nelson7.002500.003.57
A Douglas5.001800.003.60
F Wann7.0037137.005.29
J McIntyre1.00616.006.00
S McKay4.002638.676.50