ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club 3rd XI v St.Modans on Sun 17 Jul 2016 at 1pm
ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club Lost 8 wickets

Match report When the coin fell as a head on Sunday before the Forfarshire 3rd XI v St Modans Sunrisers league clash, home skipper Clark had no hesitation in batting first.

Why wouldn’t he? The day before had seen 500 runs scored on the same wicket. The curator tending to the ground pre match was delighted with the track. The ends of the pitch were as hard as they had been all season. On paper the home team had a decent batting line up. His star bowler and vice-captain had a raging hangover. No brainer. “We’ll have a bat” Clark pronounced to the black training shoe wearing visiting captain, Reeve.

Opening up for the home team were the multi-talented Hogarth and young Girolami who was being given a chance at the top of the order. The visiting attack was led by Wilson. Known to all as Lumpy (reason unknown), he is famed in SPCU circles for being an extremely enthusiastic chap who has a very long run up - and then bowls at a surprisingly slow pace. No problem to face on the rock hard Forthill surface was the prediction. The new ball was shared perhaps surprisingly by the genuine slow medium of Seshageri as opposed to a quicker option.

The stage was set for a nice home total – a pleasant tea – and then a defence of the score and the sticking of 25 points in the bag and a move ahead of Dundee High Hurricanes at the basement of the Championship.

No chance. What followed was an inept batting show and a collapse that was of incredible proportions.

Jack, Cammy, James, Clark, Morgan and Blair all fell rapidly to the combined wiles of Lumpy and Seshy and suddenly the home team were 19 for 6. Simmy (often the saviour in back to the wall situations) also went as Sultan came on and took for 3 for 1. The desire of the visiting skipper to involve new bowlers thankfully resulted in a few wides that boosted the total ( extras ended top scorer with 10) but not enough to make a huge difference and before we knew it the home team were all out for 40………… and in a daze. To be fair, it is doubtful if the visitors could fully comprehend events either……… especially when Lumpy took two excellent caught and bowled chances. No other chances were put down. Going against the current trend of umpiring in the division, we even gave an LBW. 40……… on a cracking Forthill wicket! Unbelievable…..

Not surprisingly, tea was not ready to be taken and we immediately took the field for the second half. Indeed, Chef Dave was still reading the front page of the Sunday Sport and had not raised his head from his literature choice never mind put on the urn. The inevitable happened, and in spite of Liam thankfully taking a couple of wickets – the required total was reached with minimal discomfort.

What can you say? One of these days? A batting disaster? That was rubbish? How about. “I can’t believe he batted first” That was one of the comments overheard and the skipper had to go and take a long hard look in the mirror - which proved difficult as there isn’t one in the dressing room. Instead he sat crying in the shower.

Tea was readied and was taken in the confines of the pool room – which is now known as the tea room as there is no longer a pool table in the pool room. Maybe it was the shock of the game, but tea was a bit of a haze. There was pizza and pieces, juice and tea…..and some nice cakes. But how could you eat after that? Simmy polished off his second plate of sarnies before declaring; “that was even worse than Do’ocot.” I thought he was referring to the tea – but turned out he was referring to our last batting disaster which resulted in just 22 runs being scored at the Dome.

Tea got 65 out of 100. Been a while since the tea got a higher score than the team at Forthill.

A hastily arranged T20 was then played to give everyone a run out. For the record, the home team chased 66 and won comfortably…!!! Maybe should have bowled first...!!!

With time to kill, the team all downloaded Pokémon Go. The chase was on. Jake and James reported back that they had found a “Spud” and a “Munter” in Brechin. Blair and Cammy went straight home and found a “Stain” in their Dad’s bed, a “Pizza” in the bin and four dog like creatures that seemed too real to be true in their kitchen. Ted stayed at Forthill and found a “ZZ Top” behind the bar in Ted’s Shed, a “Cully” in the groundsman’s shed and a “Dick” raking in the bins for tin cans. Clark searched all day but had no luck in finding the very rare “Batter”.

Next week sees a home game against the Do’ocot Dynamos second eleven and with league points a must to avoid the trap door and relegation to the Vauxhall Conference North-North East league three, all players are asked to report for batting practice on Friday from 6 am until 8pm.

ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club 3rd XI Batting
Player Name RunsMB4s6sSRCtStRo
for 10 wickets

(19.1 overs)
Jack Hogarth ct & b Wilson 6 1
James (jnr) Girolami ct & b Wilson 3
Cameron Walker b Wilson 3
Clark McConnachie ct Lawson b Seshgari 1
Morgan Sargeant ct Currie b Wilson 0
Blair Walker lbw Seshgari 2
David Sim ct Belli b Sultan 4 1
Jake Harrison ct Reeve b Sultan 2
Harry Hardie ct Belli b Ward 5
Liam Latto b Sultan 0
Gordon Walker Not Out  4

St.Modans Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
J Wilson 5.01942.251.80
R Seshageri 5.00919.001.80
T Sultan 3.02130.330.33
S Gupta 3.00600.002.00
A Ward 2.001100.005.50
J Mould 1.10313.002.57

St.Modans Batting
Player name RMB4s6sSR
for 2 wickets
41 (9.3 overs)
T Sultan st Sim b Latto 16
D Belli ct Hogarth b Latto 3
B Turner Not Out  1
S Gupta Not Out  7
R Seshageri  
A Ward  
J Mould  
J Wilson  
A Lawson  
L Currie  
F Reeve  

ion8 Forfarshire Cricket Club 3rd XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Jake Harrison5.001500.003.00
Liam Latto4.3023211.505.11